they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Randomize
