I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
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