I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
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Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
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Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
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