I will die if light touches me.
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
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