They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
Randomize
