he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
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