u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Everything about him screamed your future.
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She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
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