it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
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