this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
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