he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
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