Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize
