she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
