dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Randomize
