How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
I think I sprained my soul last night
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Randomize
