he puts the penis in happiness.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
