before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
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