Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize
