I could have mohawked her pubes.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
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