Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
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