Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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