Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
Randomize
