Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Randomize
