Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
Randomize
