I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
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