i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
