Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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