margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
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