Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
Randomize
