I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize