: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
Randomize