He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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