I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
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