I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
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