I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
I think my fart just growled at me.
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
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