Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
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