as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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