at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
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