Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
Drake has all the answers
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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