i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
