So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
