oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
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