Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
