She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
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