it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Is it penis luge time yet?
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Randomize