We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
