hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dear awkwardly drunk roommate, thanks for stuffing enough change in my clevage that I could afford a pepsi at work today. Sincerely awesome roommate that put up with your drunk ass
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
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