And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Randomize