I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Randomize