I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
