yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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